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WHAT? WHERE? 

Whether you and your crew want white-knuckle rollercoaster rides, to dine in a restaurant styled like Ratatouille or to gaze in awe at Sleeping Beauty’s iconic pink castle, you’re in for a treat. Europe’s most popular theme park lies just outside Paris (45km to be precise), easily reached by taxi or train. First surprise? it’s two parks: Disneyland Paris and the smaller (though size doesn’t matter, right?) Walt Disney Studios Park.

THE VIBE 

Pure, unfiltered Disney. The moment you step through the gates (there are two sets, security and then each park has its own entrance), you’re transported to another world, one where you can chat to Cinderella, have an Avenger’s burger for lunch and get lost in an Alice in Wonderland’s labyrinth. Everywhere you look people of all ages are wearing Mickey and Minnie headbands – we even saw some excited punters dressed in head-to-toe Disney merch (yes, they were adults). When the parade along Main Street USA starts, complete with colourful floats carrying characters from Frozen etc, the atmosphere turns carnival.

And even the most hard-nosed Disney cynic will be enchanted by the spectacular nightly firework closing ceremony lighting up the sky above Sleeping Beauty’s castle, complete with dancing fountains and Disney tunes blasting out. 

WHAT TO SEE & DO 

I’m starting with the rides my sons (aged 8 and 12) BOTH voted the best. Number one – the shiny new Spider-Man W.E.B Adventure in the Marvel-themed Avengers Campus (Walt Disney Studios), where we climbed aboard a W.E.B slinger vehicle and shot spider-bots with web from OUR HANDS *Spidey web hands gesture*. It’s fast, furious and, even though I caught the least bots, I get why this one was such a hit. 

The rest of the Avengers Campus went down a storm, including Flight Force (warning, this twisty, turney coaster isn’t for the faint-hearted). Meeting Spider-Man in the Hero Training Centre was a great photo opp, though we left feeling like we probably didn’t have enough training to rid a city of criminals. Sadly, I couldn’t drag them into the Pixar Musical Adventure, ‘a journey through Toy Story, Monsters and Finding Nemo‘ (too babyish, apparently),

Over in Disneyland Paris, the kids’ favourite ride was Star Tours: The Adventures Continue found in the Discoveryland area. We put on a pair of 3D specs, stepped aboard a Starspeeder 1000 and sped through a galaxy far, far away, with thrilling glimpses of the Death Star, C-3PO and underwater realms. It’s incredibly realistic and everyone wanted to go on it again (me included!). 

We gave Stars Wars Hyperspace Mountain a swerve, though it did look thrilling, and headed instead for another white-knuckle coaster: Temple of Peril, a slightly terrifying Indiana Jones-style coaster where putting your hands in the air and screaming is obligatory. You can get more adrenaline rushes on Big Thunder Mountain plus Crush’s Coaster and The Twighlight Zone Tower of Terror in Walt Disney Studios. 

Rides aside, the shows are not to be missed. Frozen fans will want to make a beeline for Elsa and crew at Frozen: A Musical Invitation (Walt Disney Studios) where you can belt out Let It Go. The Lion King’s equally enticing and apparently Alice in Wonderland is due to take the stage in Walt Disney Studios this spring. 

All three of us thought Adventureland was excellent, a lush land of towering bamboo, spooky caves, wobbly rope bridges, an enormous (fake) tree housing the Swiss Family Robinson’s cabin, souks from Aladdin and a massive pirate galleon. Think the best play park you’ve been to on steroids. 

Got younger kids? There’s loads for little ones, particularly in Fantasyland, where we saw Peter Pan’s flight (you get to fly through a virtual Never Land) and tots can spin around in the Mad Hatter’s Tea Cups, fly in Dumbo and ride on the gentle Le Petit Train Du Cirque. 

SCOFF & QUAFF 

It’s a good job you easily exceed 10,000 steps exploring the parks, because the restaurant offering at Disney’s off the scale. Seriously, I’d be happy to just do a food tour. If your main aim is to meet Disney characters, you’re going to want to book a table at fancy French restaurant Auberge de Cendrillon in Disneyland Park, where Cinderella, Elsa and co make an appearance. Or Plaza Gardens pavilion for a chance to meet Mickey over the all you can eat buffet. 

For an authentic Ratatouille vibe, it has to be Bistrot Chez Rémy – think over-sized cocktail umbrellas, cookbooks and cutlery. While Marvel fans will want to refuel at PYM Kitchen in the Avenger Camp for the novelty value – the food, zapped by PYM particles (see Ant-Man and the Wasp) is fun-sized, from mini burgers to massive pretzels. 

For snacks/pit stops, March Hare in Fantasyland is very sweet (literally, it sells lots of ice cream), and we couldn’t resist a round of Nutella-loaded waffles from one of the many food trucks. See more dining options here.

STAY 

We slept 10 mins (by complimentary shuttle bus) from the parks at snazzy four-star Hotel L’Elysée Val d’Europe. I’m not a die-hard Disney fan, so confess I loved arriving back in the real world after 10 hours of fantasy. 

Although the food at Disneyland Paris is great, the meal of the weekend was at Le George, the hotel’s relaxed restaurant. Starters of light tuna tempura and duck, followed by succulent steak frites (the kids menu is just smaller portions of the adults, so French). Even the wine, a glass (ok two) of recommended Cote-Rotie (€12), was superb.

The kids left the table between courses to explore ‘the jungle’, a mini Kew-like double-storey glass room filled with trees, tropical ferns, banana plants and flowers. There’s a long dining table in the middle of all the foliage which you can book if you’re in a bigger party. Next door is the Diplomate Bar, which we didn’t spend too much time in, though I can confirm they serve a delicious, velvety rich hot chocolate.  

Our spotless room had two enormous squishy double beds, WiFi faster than a Disney ‘coaster and a tub, the perfect place to wallow in bubbles (the foamy kind) and ease tired legs. If there are more than four in your clan, book an XL Family Room which can fit up to eight people. 

Try and carve out a little free time to visit huge shopping centre Val d’Europe opposite the hotel, which is like adult Disneyland – upstairs dedicated to fashion and beauty and a lower floor full of French food. Muddy picked up a tube of French beauty editors’ must-have secret potion A313 Pommade from the pharmacy and a pair of black ankle boots, not bad for a 25-minute dash. 

Want to stay in-park? Disneyland Hotel (themed around Disney royalty) has just reopened its doors (after a two-year, multi-million pound reno) and it’s gone down a storm with reviewers. The upsides? Reception resembling Sleeping Beauty’s castle, getting to eat breakfast with Disney characters, pillow menus, five-star Clarins spa and a private entrance to the park. The downside? It’s £1,501 per night in April, though this is for a family of four and does include two-day park passes.

TOP TIPS

Download the Disneyland Paris app: BEFORE you go. Seriously, everything you could possibly ever need is on the app, from interactive maps, to opening times and the ability to book lunch. And take a phone charger, because if your phone shuts down, the magic will too.

Don’t try and cram in too much: These parks are BIG. Better to go for two days and spread it out, if you can.

Pack like you’re going on a hike: You’ll walk for miles (I’m talking 20,000 steps), so it’s important to be prepared. Trainers, tick. Comfy clothes, tick. Waterbottles (there are plenty of drinking fountains), tick. Snacks, tick.

Beat the queues for rides with Disney Premier Access Ultimate: If you’re not prepared to wait for up to 45 mins to get on some of the more popular rides and attractions, you can snap up premier access on the app (around €90pp per day for up to 16 rides low seasons, up to €190pp per day in peak) then simply scan the QR code at the entrance to the ride and, voila, you’re in the fast lane.

Arrive early, but not too early: The parks open at 9.30am and the queues were pretty lengthy even in low season (Feb), however by 10.30am they appeared to have eased off a little.

Take rain gear: You’re in FRANCE not FLORIDA. Rain happens, and you don’t want to spend extra money on see-through ponchos you’ll never wear again.

GO THERE!

Rooms at Hotel L’Elysée Val d’Europe start from £89pn (including complimentary shuttle to and from Disneyland Paris). Eurostar return tickets to Paris from £78. Disneyland Paris park tickets start from £75.58pp per day or £145.32pp for two days.