Muddy Stilettos


<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="2560" height="1707" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Kids-on-laptop-phone-and-tablet-scaled.jpeg" alt="Kids on laptop phone and tablet" class="wp-image-120072" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Kids-on-laptop-phone-and-tablet-scaled.jpeg 2560w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Kids-on-laptop-phone-and-tablet-600x400.jpeg 600w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Kids-on-laptop-phone-and-tablet-1000x667.jpeg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Kids-on-laptop-phone-and-tablet-1536x1024.jpeg 1536w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Kids-on-laptop-phone-and-tablet-2048x1366.jpeg 2048w" sizes="(max-width: 2560px) 100vw, 2560px" /></figure>



<p>Between gaming chats, TikTok trends and the dreaded&nbsp;<em>“Mum, can I download this?”</em>, it’s no wonder many of us feel several steps behind our kids online. The risks are real, and we all know that panic or head-burying isn’t the answer &#8211; instead, what families need is calm, practical, impartial guidance, and that’s where <a href="https://behardtohack.com/?srsltid=AfmBOorFn7KPBkpR1dWlSsUZjuIopfTAWNJM6nBeJ_eeFuv0CHPz_06c" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><strong>Be Hard to Hack</strong></a> comes in.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1500" height="1000" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Mike-Wills-headshot.jpg" alt="Mike Wills Headshot" class="wp-image-120229" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Mike-Wills-headshot.jpg 1500w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Mike-Wills-headshot-600x400.jpg 600w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Mike-Wills-headshot-1000x667.jpg 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 1500px) 100vw, 1500px" /></figure>



<p>Its founder,&nbsp;Mike Wills, knows both sides of the story: as a veteran British Army officer turned cyber-security entrepreneur, and as a dad of three (now aged 8, 18 and 21), he found himself battling the same device dramas and worries as every other parent, despite his technical know-how. Out of those experiences grew <a href="https://academy.behardtohack.com/products/communities/Digital-Parenting" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Be Hard to Hack:</a> giving parents the tools, app and community they need to keep kids safer online as well as empowering the children themselves to make smarter decisions.</p>



<p>Here are the six principles Mike advises when it comes to working out how to keep your kids safe and your family dynamic healthy.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-1-stay-one-step-ahead">1. Stay one step ahead</h2>



<p>Online threats move fast, so awareness has to be part of everyday parenting, not a once-a-year chat. And yes, we know how busy life is &#8211; it’s all too easy to say yes to a new app request without thinking (no judgement, we’ve all done it). But next time your child asks, try sitting down together: check the reviews and the age rating, see if there’s a chat function, and agree to trial it for a week before making a decision.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-2-lead-with-trust-not-fear">2. Lead with trust, not fear</h2>



<p>Trust is the strongest safety net a child can have. Restrictions and filters have their place, but children who feel safe to talk are far better protected than those who fear being punished. Keeping communication open means they are more likely to share when something online feels uncomfortable or &#8220;tricky&#8221;, instead of hiding it. Fear drives problems underground; trust brings them into the light.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-3-set-the-rules-before-the-device">3. Set the rules before the device</h2>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="667" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/small-boy-on-smart-phone-shutterstock_2143217809-1000x667.jpg" alt="Kid with smart phone" class="wp-image-100260" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/small-boy-on-smart-phone-shutterstock_2143217809-1000x667.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/small-boy-on-smart-phone-shutterstock_2143217809-600x400.jpg 600w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/small-boy-on-smart-phone-shutterstock_2143217809.jpg 1500w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p>The moment of maximum influence comes before the phone lands in their hand. Just as no parent would pass over car keys without some ground rules, digital boundaries work best when they’re set up front. One of the simplest ways to do this is with a family “device contract” – a clear agreement you can stick on the fridge. It might include where the phone lives at night (charging downstairs, not under the duvet), which apps are off-limits, when it can be used, and what happens if something goes wrong. </p>



<p>In my own family, younger children avoid games with open chat, and upgrades only arrive once a new set of rules has been agreed. Establishing expectations early keeps things calm and avoids endless battles later. Oh and a word to all the parents who think they’ve nailed phone lockdown at night: while you’re blissfully snoozing, your little darling may well have switched their settings to Sydney and carried on scrolling under the duvet. Sneaky little geniuses.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-4-model-what-you-want-to-see">4. Model what you want to see </h2>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="768" height="1000" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Screenshot-2025-09-23-at-19.18.44.png" alt="Iphone on table with cofFee" class="wp-image-120018" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Screenshot-2025-09-23-at-19.18.44.png 768w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Screenshot-2025-09-23-at-19.18.44-461x600.png 461w" sizes="(max-width: 768px) 100vw, 768px" /></figure>



<p>Children copy what they see, not what they’re told. If you’re endlessly scrolling at the dinner table, that’s the behaviour they’ll mirror. A simple shift, like narrating what you’re doing &#8211; “I’m just messaging Grandma” or “I’m checking directions” &#8211; shows little ones that phones have a purpose but shouldn’t dominate family life. </p>



<p>And it’s not only about screen time. How adults behave online sets the tone too: are your holiday snaps going up with the location tag still on? Are your privacy settings locked down? Those small choices protect your family and teach children how to be responsible digital citizens. The same goes for how we comment on social media or handle disagreements in WhatsApp groups – our kids are watching, learning and copying every move we make.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-5-plan-your-what-if-response">5. Plan your &#8220;what if&#8221; response</h2>



<p>We all know what to do in the physical world &#8211; if there’s a break-in, you call the police; if a child is hurt, you head to A&amp;E. But how many of us know what to do when something goes wrong online? A group chat turns nasty, a dodgy link is clicked, or a teenager is pressured to share images…suddenly it’s not clear. Do we call the police, the school, or a child protection agency? That’s why it helps to have a plan before the panic sets in. </p>



<p>Reassure your child first, gather evidence like screenshots, and then take the next step with confidence. Be Hard to Hack&#8217;s Parent CyberBuddy&nbsp;can guide you in real time &#8211; what to capture, who to contact, and how to handle the fallout. With a plan in place, we don’t have to improvise under pressure, and our kids learn that online problems can be solved, not hidden.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-6-build-your-digital-village">6. Build your digital village</h2>



<p>No parent should feel they’re tackling this alone. Just as we swap notes on nurseries, schools and clubs, it helps to share experiences of apps, risks and wins with other mums and dads. Talking to schools, comparing strategies with friends, or joining online parent groups can all make the digital world feel less overwhelming. And if you want extra support, Be Hard to Hack also offers a <a href="https://academy.behardtohack.com/products/communities/Digital-Parenting" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">parent community,</a> practical advice and bite-size Playbooks designed to build healthy habits one step at a time. The internet isn’t a monster under the bed. It’s a place – exciting, busy, sometimes risky –&nbsp;and with trust, clear rules and a calm plan, our children can learn to navigate it well. </p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-win-the-ultimate-tech-bundle">WIN! The ultimate tech bundle</h2>



<p>Fancy an <a href="https://muddystilettos.co.uk/reader-treats/win-apple-homepod-be-hard-to-hack/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Apple HomePod and a year&#8217;s subscription to Be Hard To Hack</a>, worth £400? Be our guest! </p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="666" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Untitled-design-270.png" alt="apple HomePod" class="wp-image-120073" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Untitled-design-270.png 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Untitled-design-270-600x400.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p><strong>For all you Muddy readers out there, you could receive 3 months FREE access across the Be Hard to Hack site by using the code: MUDDY-3M. Just click <a href="https://behardtohack.com/pages/support" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">here.</a> Hurry!</strong></p>



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Raising digital natives: A parent’s guide to online safety

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